I’m tired tonight, it’s been a long week. Lots of emotions, most of them have been low but a few glimmers of joy.
There have been many friends old and new, wonderful people and lots of very good intentions.
Hearts are in the right place and everybody is trying to help.
Now though I just want to go home, home to my family, home to hold them tight, tell them I love them and then sleep in my own bed.
I can and I will do just that tomorrow.
I’ll get to say goodnight to the people I love the most, tuck them into their warm clean beds, in their lovely rooms, surrounded by beautiful things but most of all surrounded by love, lots of it, something that they quite rightly take for granted and I hope that never changes.
But all of this, everything I have just written, to you and to me is our normal. We have that, every day, aren’t we just so damn lucky.
Today we spent the day in a children’s home, Ranfurly.
Calling it a ‘home’ is a little stretch, it is more of a facility but for 46 children it is home. A tired, physically run down care facility, trying hard to provide a safe place, a roof over heads, somewhere dry to sleep and food to fill young bellies.
Strangers are coming and going, there are those good and very much needed intentions I mentioned earlier, food, clothes, books, toys… our group is among those strangers. We all think we have something special to offer, we all want to bring a little joy to kids that haven’t seen much of that. For some, since the wake of the hurricane life has been even harder, devastating in fact, for those escaping from it and for those who have had their ‘normality’ interrupted by a whole new intake of parentless children, thru loss, abandonment and escape from abuse.
Children aged 8-18 (7 years olds currently accepted too) this is a time of crisis.
I felt a little numb walking around the school, sorry home, but it looks like a school that has beds but certainly no resting place. There was no peaceful sanctuary, no escape from stress, no quiet or privacy and certainly no luxurious comfort.
No armchairs to curl up in and read a book or watch TV or just sit and chat.
No kitchen table to sit at whilst watching Mum or Dad or someone who loves you cooks dinner for the night.
There are signs stuck to walls with rules on, good rules, visitor books in the office for strangers going in and out, over stretched staff and volunteers who care enough to put their own lives on hold to get these kids safely to eighteen years old the best they can on the meagre budget they are given, selling raffle tickets to raise money just so they can have cupboards to put donated, previously worn, clothes in that currently live on the floor, this list could go on and on in fact I am a little overwhelmed with the need to just stay there and do something, anything to help.
I think that must have been what happened to the adults I met there today, they got sucked into the place, someone needs to care about these kids.
Whilst there with my camera, sticking my nose into their business, into their home, they asked me to ‘be kind’ to them. Outsiders judging this place seems to be the status quo.
I’ll admit the current chaos of the entire building was very distressing to me, not something I would want my children to have to come home to after a long day at school but I am not judging, you can feel that the people running Ranfurly cared, they are just stretched to the limit and are currently in a state of crisis, the storm has just doubled the amount of children they are now taking care of.
We met and sat with three beautiful girls today. All of which had dreams and aspirations. Quietly at first they told us a few things about themselves, we told them stories about our own lives hoping to encourage and give them hope for better times in the future.
We had the best intentions.
But now when I think about our conversations I just feel so sad, foolish even, telling kids it’ll be ok and then watching them go back to this life they have been handed. I’ve no doubt they will grow up to much better things, I for one know we can make our own selves a better life but it should be now, for those kids, they should be living, not existing.
They should be looking forward to tomorrow, the weekend, the next school holiday, parties, special times. They have nothing to look forward to apart from the odd brief visit from well intentioned strangers and then turning 18, you know when life is suddenly so much better, out in the world, on your own, fending for yourself.
I digress, it’s my weakness, this should all be about the hurricane relief and what we need to do to help right now.
Read til the end I can help you with that.
Before we get to the bits you can buy list let’s talk about the most important thing we can do for these children, the survivors of the hurricane, because this hideous storm has created many more orphans that the system can barely manage to support, abandoned children currently living in the care of the establishment and future children that find themselves walking thru the doors of Ranfurly or any orphanage anywhere, in any part of the world.
The thing that these children need more than anything is parents. I’m not suggesting you all have to go foster or adopt but just give a little bit of your time.
What these children need is someone to listen to them, hear them, understand them and care enough to tell them they are proud of them.
They need a table to sit at surrounded by family, they need to go to the movies once in a while, they need to learn to swim, get dance lessons, go to football practice, get help with homework, maybe a hug every now and then and perhaps a shoulder to cry on.
I’m sorry, I know I ask for too much but for all the things on the very important material wish list, the things I mention above are what they need the most.
Impossible isn’t it, what I ask of you. You are there, they are here, you have lives and children and oh so many things, I know and I understand, I am no better for all my intentions.
There is something that could change their lives. Money, the school needs serious funding. Perhaps if the care givers weren’t so occupied with having to raise funds to feed them then they could take the time to be with them, parent them, not just babysit them.
Then the everyday donations. We can console ourselves by doing that, it is needed and necessary and gratefully received.
We asked today what was needed especially, the list is long but here’s a few necessary items.
Hygiene products, soap, shampoo, sanitary pads for the girls. Cleaning products, grits, chips, coloring books & medicines.
Also, a special request was mentioned, we really need reading material on surviving childhood abuse, how to cope with living alone, being abandoned, now you are an orphan, life after disaster.
Things you really shouldn’t have to be reading or even be aware of when you are aged 7-18 years old.
For some of these kids this was life even before Dorian and for others it is their new reality, one that they now face alongside the grief and pain of sudden horrific loss.
Carey Sheffield
Thank you to Leah Thompson & Chase Carter for your excellent company this week and for the glimmer of joy you bought to three young girls who haven’t seen much of that in their lives.
If you would like to help with donations, funding or even your time please do get in touch. If you are a skilled tradesman, teacher, counselor or someone who would like to offer emotional support to these children you are very much needed.
