I have tried to talk to many different people on this project, inject diversity, see individuals from all walks of life.  Of course that all depends where my day takes me and who is around me.

Today I spent the day with my children at their favourite busy theme park so I decided I was going to try and find somebody in a wheelchair.

This was difficult for me, not because I feel any differently towards people that may have to use a wheelchair, more because I don’t want anyone to think I am using them or taking them for granted for the sake of my project. I just want to show people that despite our differences we are all the same.

My first approach was to a woman in her thirties, we chatted happily as I explained what I was doing and how I would like her to be part of it.  Her partner or husband joined in the conversation and it was him that said no thank you.  Politely I said no problem, have a great day.  I walked away suddenly cross with myself because I didn’t check with her, a grown woman,ask her if she had the same opinion, why did I allow him to speak for her?  Because she was in a wheelchair.  It left me cross with myself and also cross with him for speaking for someone who was more than capable of speaking for herself. How frustrating it must be when a conversation occurs over your head when you are sat right there, I will never allow that to happen again, it was a great learning experience.

Not deterred I saw another young woman, surrounded by whom I presumed was her family.  I addressed her and politely involved her family in the conversation but this time it was her decision if she would like to be part of my project.

Mercedes is a delightful girl and immediately I could see she was confident, intelligent and determined, I was looking forward to talking to her.  Her family didn’t want to hang around so we didn’t have long, which was a shame because I could have listened to her quite happily for some time.

Name: Mercedes

Occupation: Post Doc Fellow with a Doctorate Degree in Psychology

‘I work in a Private Practice now, I am hoping to stay there.  I like doing therapy there. I do a little bit of everything, I like to see all of the ages and that way its never boring.’

1.Where were you born and raised?

‘I was born in Boston and raised in New Hampshire until I was eighteen, I miss it up there but it is warmer here.’

‘I grew up with my Mum and I have a brother and my Dad is separate.  My Dad was separate and I visited him too.  It was good and quiet, we lived in the woods in the middle of nowhere and that was nice. I went to this little private school.  I was well loved and it was really nice.’

2.Tell me a childhood memory.

‘I remember visiting my Grandparents a lot and they lived on a lake.  We would walk round their garden and they would point out different plants and they would tell me about them and list the plants, it was really peaceful.’

3.What is your favourite season and why?

‘Probably the spring, I am not really well in the heat or the cold.  The wheels don’t turn well and stuff. In the last five years I ended up in a wheelchair before that I was alright.  I have a heart condition.  I have Postural Tachycardia Syndrome,  Pots.  Its like my heart is all messed up with my blood pressure and if I stand up for any length of time I faint.’

4.Tell me about someone you love.

‘My Mum is here so I guess I think of her first.  I love her a lot. She is always there for me and she is rally accepting and very supportive.  She packed me this lunch box full of iceboxes because I don’t do really well in the heat.  I didn’t ask her to, I didn’t mention it but it was a really nice thing to do.  I respect that about her.  She is so social she just fits in anywhere, I always had a cool Mum and she is so pretty.’

5.What words of wisdom do you have for the reader about life?

‘Perseverance is a good thing, I have stuck to my guns and set goals for myself, a little bit at a time and I have really stuck with those, even if they took me longer.  You can only do what you do.  If you really stick with it you can get places.’

6.Dreams for the future.

‘Work hard, I want to get where I want to be with my career and get established with that.  I’m in this long distance relationship and I want him to move down here.  We have been in the relationship for six years and I am hoping we will be in the same state soon.  I have a bunch of pets, I’d like some more that’ll be great.’

We are all born with a condition, whether physical, emotional, colour, height, weight or sex.  The condition is ‘difference’.  No two people are the same but we all try to fit under the banner of ‘normal’, why is that?

Mercedes has skills way beyond my reach, an intellect certified by a Degree that I have not and will probably never achieve but put us along side each other people may wrongly consider me more ‘able’.

When I write these words it is not with judgement, this is an education long overdue for myself too.  My upbringing instilled many prejudices that I have spent my adult life fighting against but why does the human race still spend so much precious time with the measuring stick?

Mercedes, congratulations on your Degree, an outstanding achievement.  I hope your love joins you soon, if there is room for him with all your animals!  It was a delight to meet you, you have a wonderful disposition and I know that will be a great help in your work.

In order to help other people in their own journey through life you have to have a greater understanding and acceptance of humanity in all its guises.  My journey through this project has me seeking out people, watching them and trying to understand what they are thinking, feeling.  If only we paid that much attention in everyday life.